My Thoughts and Head Space

Some of you might have noticed I have been silent/absent for a few weeks from posting. I have been  processing a lot – 2018 has been a rough year; a love was lost, a few close friends/colleagues passed away (natural causes, in the line of duty and some took their own lives), work has been mentally & emotionally draining in The DRC with very little off time for rest and respite, plus writers block has hit me of late, although the writings that do emerge are filled with far to many dark thoughts & silent screams skirting the shadows of my mind. So I have withdrawn, not processing on social media, but in private, so many emotions & thoughts circle the shadows of my mind, trying to focus on the positive & write happy thoughts, but my writing is still skirting the dark.

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I do know that there is light at the end of the tunnel and the progression of healing takes time, and one must just learn to be patient with one’s self, and allow the healing to take place. I want to thank the few close friends who have been there for me … Thanks T, and a few others ….

Cogito Ergo Sum – in 3 parts

I wrote this poem in Nov 2016 as 3 separate poems, but they are meant to be read as one. Here it is re-edited and posted in its entirety. The poem emerges from the cocoon of my reading and musings of TS Elliot, Dante, Descartes and some Arthur Conan Doyle.

 

1.

when you down who lifts you up

when you are lost who finds you

when you fall, is it from grace

if so, whose grace



who is lost with you

who binds the wounds

whom do you discover, when you are down

yourself or another



what awaits over the horizon

what lies beneath the wounds

what lifts you up

come on rise up



we rise by lifting others up

we discover ourselves when lost

we need not be alone

come on, stand together



every breath is a doorway

to heaven or hell

so just breath

and rise up



2.

as you await at

breaths doorway

just breathe

and see what awaits

as you pause to exhale



by not breathing

we are forced to choose

heaven or hell

but let not fear inspire

either mortality or immortality



let Virgil be your guide

through the mythical dark wood

of spiritual values

that at times

perverts' human intellect



the pilgrims journey

demands questions be answered

within the dark forest

on a crooked path

the meaningful can become meaningless

as we journey on a quest

into the unlit darkness



3.

we are on a journey

on a quest

into the darkened heart

of life, doubts and dreams

that search for proof of life



strength in life, rests on doubt

accept that which you know to be true

are dream states virtual reality

is life one constant dream

what is real?



let knowledge be your secure foundation

not the imagination thereof

but the doubt thereof

let doubt be your proof of life

doubt creates sanity



life is stronger than anything the mind can invent

what is real are our thoughts

doubt your senses

doubt your existence

rise up and claim your reality

think,

therefore, you live

© 2018 Michael D Emmerich

My Space

travelling into my space

the road less travelled

it’s better this way

dipping in and out

not to live

just to visit

it can be a scary process

discovering what lies beneath

in my space

© 2017 michael d emmerich